March Madness Round 1, Day 2: Gohlke!

In college I was told I did not know how good I had it, and, up until now, I would've disagreed. I thought they were referring to being young and able to drink a six-pack at 11am on a Wednesday whenever I pleased, which, while nice, has it's time and place. What I did not know, is that they were referring to my ability to be in Las Vegas four years straight for the first weekend of March Madness. Between trying to track games in a secluded cubicle at work, ignoring coworkers at happy hour with my eyes on the TV, and watching Gohlke sink the Wildcats on my phone at the Austin Rodeo, I now long for those days back. Submitting my PTO for this time next year first thing tomorrow.

A few amazing games, a lot of blowouts on Thursday. The day is not done while we write this, but it looks like we had a decent day (edit, we went 12-7. Great day!). Let's get into Friday's games.

Northwestern (9) vs FAU (8)

FAU -3.5, O/U 143.5

After returning everyone from their Cinderella run last year, FAU had high hopes for the season and underachieved slightly from their pre-season top-25 ranking. The Owls learned quickly that the game is a lot tougher with a target on your back. They opened as a 1.5 point favorite and have been bet all the way up to 3.5, and I think a lot of that has to do with people's memories of them last year and Northwestern being, well, nerds. Vlad Goldin is a dominate force for them, but it's hard to ride a big man in March. The best player on the floor is Boo Bouie on Northwestern who can easily put up 30 any night it seems. I'm backing Boo Bouie and the nerds.

The pick: Northwestern +3.5 (Bonus pick: Northwestern moneyline +140)

Colgate (14) vs Baylor (3)

Baylor -14.5, O/U 138.5

Colgate have been a trendy upset pick, but after not pulling it out their past few appearances, their hype train has slowed significantly. Nobody is giving them a fair shake, and that tends to scare me (case-in-point: Oakland). I'm not saying they will pull out the upset, but it scares me enough to not swallow 14.5. I feel Colgate will keep this close or be suffocated by Baylor's defense. Either way that doesn't equal points.

The pick: Under 138.5

UAB (12) vs San Diego State (5)

SDSU -6.5, O/U 139.5

The Mountain West have not had the best go of it so far, losing 3 of their 6 teams already. San Diego State's success last year took a lot of pressure of the "don't trust the Mountain West" take last year, but their run is starting to look like the exception, not the rule. UAB have laid their fair share of stinkers, but have beat some good teams in SMU, FAU, and Drake. If UAB brings their A-game, I don't see this as an easy win for the Aztecs.

The pick: UAB +6.5 (Bonus pick: UAB moneyline +225)

Western Kentucky (15) vs Marquette (2)

Marquette -14.5, O/U 158.5

Next time someone from the Midwest tells you they're a Notre Dame fan for no other reason than they're Catholic, ask them why they don't cheer for Marquette and watch them stumble over their words. Either they are sheep just following the herd and backing the Irish for literally 0 reason (90% of their fanbase), or, worse, they hate Jesuits. Either way, don't be friends with them. AMDG baby.

The pick: Marquette -14.5

Stetson (16) vs UCONN (1)

UCONN -26.5, O/U 145.5

UCONN are the most popular pick to win it all, and last year they rode double-digit wins galore to the National Championship. I don't see much changing in the first few rounds for them. But 26.5 is a lot of points and Stetson LAUNCH three-pointers. I don't expect them to pull the upset, but just to make enough of their shots to force UCONN to do so as well.

The pick: Over 145.5

New Mexico (11) vs Clemson (6)

New Mexico -2.5, O/U 151.5

New Mexico opened as one-point favorites and have been bet up to -2.5. In case you missed it, one poor Clemson fan pulled an all-nighter watching every New Mexico State just to write up a scouting report on the fanbase's message board. As someone who stay up writing a blog for absolutely nobody, I can't make fun of him for the task, but I CAN make fun of him for watching the completely wrong team, as New Mexico is, in fact, not New Mexico state. Poor Bubba Beer Gut from South Carolina. On the court Clemson are lead by their Center, but also shoot the 3 more often and better than guard-dominant New Mexico. I don't see the trendy upset pick here.

The pick: Clemson +2.5 (Bonus pick: Clemson moneyline: +120)

Yale (13) vs Auburn (4)

Auburn -12.5, O/U 139.5

We've covered nerds and rednecks separately already, but now we have nerds vs rednecks. Unless a No. 2 pencil can somehow get involved in this game, I don't see Yale standing a chance. Yale beat a 13-18 Brown team by 1 to make the tourney, after losing to them a few days prior. They do not deserve to be here, and yes I am still bitter Princeton lost in the Ivy League tournament and we were denied Candian sensation Xaivian Lee. It's the wrong school, as Eddie O would say, Go Tigahs.

The pick: Auburn -12.5

Colorado (10) vs Florida (7)

Florida -1.5, O/U 158.5

We usually get one first-four team to make a run in the tourney, and Colorado looks like our only shot. Problem is, Florida are really good. They beat Bama by double digits twice and made it to the SEC Final, all in 12 days. However, they did dodge a few big schools in their tourney bracket. I could see this going either way, but being forced to pick a side, I'd take Florida's pace and volume shooting. It's Friday, let the Boulder students go home and party like we all know they want to.

The pick: Florida -1.5

Texas A&M (9) vs Nebraska (8)

Nebraska -1.5, O/U 147.5

Nebraska opened as three-point favorites, but this has been bet down to a tighter game. Win or lose, if you don't know Keisei Tominaga now, you will after this game. The kid might not be built for the NBA, but he is tailor-made for March. Both these teams are guard-heavy and shoot a ton of 3's. This may be the best basketball game of the first round, I cannot wait to watch. I'm hoping the shots go in and we also have a decent shot of OT.

The pick: Over 147.5

Vermont (13) vs Duke (4)

Duke -12.5, O/U 132.5

Vermont are always a trendy upset pick, and, like any true American, I hate Duke. As much as they have choked down the stretch and I want them to lose, I fear that would be too good to be true. Vermont's low scoring totals are bringing this total down, but both teams turn it over A LOT and Vermont shoots a lot of three's, so I don't se this game staying in the low-mid 60's.

The pick: Over 132.5

Grambling (16) vs Purdue (1)

Purdue -26.5, O/U 138.5

Purdue are determined not to re-live the embarrassment of last year, and Grambling are lucky to be here after burning me in the First Four. Oh, and Zach Edey. Enough said.

The pick: Purdue -26.5

Charleston (13) vs Alabama (4)

Bama -9.5, O/U 173.5

The Over. Just look at that over. It's higher than Snoop Dogg at Woodstock with Willy Nelson in a Volkswagen van sitting on furry pillows. It's beautiful. I told myself when the bracket was revealed that I don't care what the number is, I'm taking the over in this game. I hope we hit 200. I cannot wait to watch this game.

The pick: Over 173.5

Longwood (16) vs Houston (1)

Houston -23.5, O/U 128.5

Houston dominate and suffocate bad teams. I don't see this one being close but 23.5 is a HUGE spread when you consider the low total of 128.5. Either take Houston and the over or Longwood and the under. We're going to back the Cougars.

The pick: Houston -23.5, Over 128.5

James Madison (12) vs Wisconsin (5)

Wisconsin -5.5, O/U 145.5

The much anticipated Pardon My Take Championship Game! When Wisconsin make their 3's, they can beat anyone, when they don't, anyone can beat them. In February they lost their shooting stroke and things looked grim, but they found it in early March and rode it to the Big 10 title game. Does it carry over to the tournament? The only big win JMU have are Michigan State, who they beat by 3 in November. I'm not sold on either team, and 5.5 is a big number.

The pick: JMU +5.5

TCU (9) vs Utah State (8)

TCU -4.5, O/U 150.5

If things fall a certain way, this could be the last hope for the Mountain West. Thing is, they face off against wily veteran Jamie Dixon. Both teams are mediocre shooting teams and roster former Trojans (thanks a lot, Enfield) that they bring off the bench. Their colors aren't too different either. I don't see too much in this game, but I'm banking on a close game throughout which keeps the total low.

The pick: Under 150.5

Grand Canyon (12) vs St Mary's (5)

Saint Mary's -5.5, O/U 131.5

Remember how much it sucked to watch Virginia play earlier this week? Ya, now take that and make them all half as athletic and twice as annoying and you have Saint Mary's. On the other side, I'm still not convinced Grand Canyon who built their school and athletic program on a TV marketing campaign are to be taken seriously. Not a fan of ending the best two-days in sports with this stinker, but I like points and offense so I'll take Grand Canyon purely with my heart.

The pick: GCU -5.5

Running March Madness record: 15-9